Dream

I had 3 dreams that night. My boyfriend were inside all my 3 dreams. I woke up only remembering my 2nd dream. It felt so real...it's like I can feel the emotions. So scary. It's too damn real.

We were older in my dream (I guess) and he proposed to me. All is good. I agreed and was very happy. On the day of the wedding, he did something which pissed me off real bad so I called off the wedding. I was angry and annoyed. He asked me not to and begged me to forgive him but i never did. There came a Caucasian who liked me for very long alrd and he was there for me that day. I decided to marry him instead (LOL IKR WTF). I even invited my boyfriend to the wedding just to spite him. Then...suddenly...he jumped out of the window. He committed suicide. Everybody was like wtf and couldn't believe this had happened. Being a bitch, I said we'll continue with the wedding.

So I married the ang moh and the scene changed to only melissa and I. I kept asking her questions like "you think I caused his death?" "is it my fault?" "why did this have to happen". I couldn't remember what she told me in my dream but I was really sad. I didn't cry though..just felt really sad. Then I thought to myself (still in my dream), nobody treats me as good as he did, nobody will love me as much as he did and nobody can make me as happy as he could. Then, I woke up. When I woke up, I was super thankful that it was just a dream and I woke up from it. It's so horrible and I don't even want to think about it.

It feels so weird that I am still so rational in my dream when I thought nobody will treat me as good as he did. It's true. He's the best that I ever had. This dream made me cherish him more because I don't want to lose him. If I lose him, I'll be nothing. I'll be nothing without him.